Anything that is with hostility is anti. And as such discernment vice judgement can be distinguished. That which makes you theirfore compassionate is the sense actively when under the control of ego; or silently when absent from the terms of ego. Come to the notion that all such is self-serving unless you let go of the deed & come unto the realm of self-lessness. Such theirfore is compassion and discernment distinguished. They come in different ways but never are aggressive to the point of no return. Neither harming, To the self nor to the appointed being. One needs to learn discernment by the consent of "Oh, That's how it" IS rather then This is what he / her Is "like". Compassion ever Lifts the person from the point of gutter. The Remedy You perform out is that which you seek to receive, Thus if you become hostile it is self-harming. So you ought to give out that which is beneficent.
If you seek to rescue other's Free them of their bondage. Thus is the Transfer granted great for both of the parties, that they are freed and you receive the lesson to help free. In either way they receive just as much a lesson of their own if you do it pleasantly right. If it feels like your eating up their lesson, it means your ego is too grant and you do it the wrong way. It is never self harming neither hostile in such way. Their is a just balance wherein no one feels wronged that is best served. It takes trials and self-reflection to learn it Best. But even then the ego is at it's first reich of it's kingdom before it can be turned unto buddhaistic nature. They Connect with the Christian Teachings.
Charity is long suffering and is kind; Charity does not envy; Charity does not parade itself, it is not puffed up; does not behave itself rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks (of) no evil; does not rejoice in iniquities, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes [—] all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Charity/Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail..; — 1st Letter to the Corinthians 13:4-8
Their is a difference between the act and the nature, if it is the act; the deed comes from the mind; if it is the nature, it comes from the eb (heart). Theirinfor are the distinction if the deed is pure. It takes mental acts to cause the heart to be established. But if the seeking is their, it means it is knicked and thus an embrace of the welcoming of the heart. Compassion forms itself off off that; When the heart is touched. It can be a mental deed too, but the mind can not form that which the heart speaks. Thus to benefit it needs both mind and heart best; but if you may choose between heart or mind; choose mind, because the gift if purer; So long the heart is in a right place, Compassion is good. If elsewise it comes from the evil one. If you are a heart person, remain theirin for compassion, The Vector-Method of compassion forms first from the heart then to the mind; In either way, a good deed is better then non. So the least you concern yourself with self, The better it is in purity. Thus was Corinthians written.
What is the difference between discernment and judgement; help verses co-dependency.
Is compassion an action or is compassion sometimes silence, sitting in silence? Or is it different thing in different times?
if we rescue others, do we feed our ego and keep the person from learning the lesson?
I feel as if it is a snake eating it’s tail.
Judgment comes from what we observe in the external, and often comes first as thoughts. "I don't trust this person because of what they are wearing, or what their cultural background is, etc." And it is an immediate decision.
Discernment comes from an internal nudging that says, pay more attention. And it is not something where you make a decision about something or someone. You are instead being more cautious, treading more slowly. "I'm not sure what I feel about this person or thing, and I can't think of what is making me weary. I will just see how it goes, and make a clearer conclusion when I've seen more."
Help is helping someone with something they cannot do themselves, or helping them once in a while, or teaching them independence. For ex, you might help a young child get a glass of water. At present, they cannot do it themselves, but it will not be something that lasts forever, and you will teach them how to get their own water when they are taller, able to hold a glass steadily, etc.
Co-dependency is when you are helping someone who should be able to do it on their own - but to the level where they default to you. I accidently enable co-dependent relationships with some of my friends. They ask me for advice, I give it to them, they now default to my advice for all things every day. (I of course am trying to help them make their own choices - but that is also up to them and when they are ready).
If situations become like the co-dependent situation, then yes there may be too much rescuing. And it can inhibit the person from learning their own lesson. But I have friends who were once co-dependent on me, but now are fully in their power. I was a stepping stone on their journey to that. So you will want to check in with yourself.
As for feeding the ego with rescuing, I think it depends on the person and situation. Giving advice is fun and fulfilling when it serves someone. But it is exhausting when they are dependent on you. I don't see fulfillment as ego-based, but soul based. I don't see wanting to avoid a person because they are too dependent on you as feeding the ego.
But, in all relationships, both sides are learning something. I must learn to set better boundaries, and to let people learn to swim on their own. They must learn to respect boundaries and start trusting themselves.
It's all in how you choose to look at it, and what you choose to do about it. If helping someone feels good, and like it is serving both of you, keep doing it. If it feels like it is hurting one or both of you, readjust.
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